Tuesday, April 3, 2012

The contemplative nature of driving

We drove to Columbus Sunday so Kurt could do some kind of work-related shenaniganry at OSU. The kids were loud and cranky (and subsequently woke up with head colds after sleeping maybe 3 hours in the hotel). The car trips were way longer than they should have been, and everybody was on the edge. As chauffeur, I did my duty by letting my mind wander while weaving erratically through freeway traffic. Not really. I'm such a grandma driver that I recently received the max 30% "Snapshot" discount from Progressive after letting them track me like a wildebeast for 30 days. But the part about my mind wandering, oh yes.

I took some mental notes:

"Oh look! A family! I like families! Doopy doop. I'll just get in this random family's car at the park! Loyalty shmoyalty!"
What would they do with my dog if we all died on this trip, and would she notice that a new family adopted her? Much like David, she just kind of randomly joins other families when we're out in public. Maybe she'd never really realize we were missing. Hmph.

Oh sure, this is loads of fun for Msr. Lobster. "Boil me, eat me, whatevs." Creative Commons licensed by imnotquitejack
Do we really, really know that the lobster doesn't much mind being boiled alive? This whole thing seems very suspect to me. 

This did not happen. Phew. Creative Commons licensed by The Tire Zoo.
 Maybe one of my tires isn't blown up enough? Does it feel weird toward the passenger rear wheel? What is that noise? Is it highway noise or something else? When do I alert my passengers? Should I? Kurt will be really annoyed when it turns out to be nothing. But what if it is something? Oh good a rest area. At this point, I turn to Kurt and fairly scream "We are stopping at this rest area!! WE NEED TO STOP!" I'm content to just let him assume I'm losing bladder control in my increasing old age.

Is it pervy that I remember my third grade teacher's ample cleavage? She surely had no idea, but man, we all got an eyeful every time she leaned over our desks. I was always blushing when she talked to me, and she wrote "Sarah is a sweet girl, but I hope she becomes more confident this year!" on my report card. Yeah, I was just feeling awkward because of your constant boobs-in-my-face, Mrs. Let's-go-with-Smith! Honestly, she was a great teacher. I do remember more than the cleavage, but wowza.

If only we could all pull off the sunglasses-all-the-time like the Blues Brothers.

 I wear my sunglasses at night. So I can. So I can... I cannot even believe this song is still floating around in my brain. I was pregnant with David when it started and he will be 4 in a few months. This is how people go insane, I think.

Turns out there's a whole flickr category for displaying what's in your bag!
 I also thought a lot about what people keep in their bags. I have a nearly irresistible urge to rummage around in other people's bags. I am dying to know what's in there, even though I'm relatively sure it's just gum wrappers and keys to things that they don't own anymore.


Jen said...

Next time we hang out, you can totally go through my purse. If you promise to clean it out in the process. But I'm serious—you can totes go through it. I have another friend who does that, too. It's like a compulsion.

Sarah Hunt said...

lol, sweet! I am relieved/worried that there are others like me. It reminds me a bit of David Sedaris, who openly discusses his OCD, when he talks about being unable to resist touching people's hair. I have so far been able to control myself, but has been very distracting at times! I'm like "Oh hey, do you have any gum in there? No? Oh. Hey, do you carry a hairbrush around? I bet you could fit a good size hairbrush in there... Um hey, look at this pocket inside MY purse. I wonder if most purses have a pocket like this. I know! Let's look at YOUR purse. It's for science."

The other Jen said...

Thankfully, I do not even carry a purse!

Anonymous said...

I read your blog all the time and sometimes I swear you're my twin. ;) Keep writing!

Sarah Hunt said...

Dang anonymous comments, lol. Now I really want to know who my internet twin might be!

Sarah Hunt said...

Hmm I can just rummage around in your kitchen drawers if that works better for you.

Post a Comment